What is the most important, most wanted, most necessary and most essential thing in your life?
I have never had anyone answer me “air” so do not feel too bad if you were thinking about something else.
But the truth is that “air” is the correct answer – if you don’t believe me go to the kitchen put a garbage bag over your head, so you can't breath, and wait a couple of minutes :)
Here is a little pyramid of human necessities that psychologist Abraham Maslow created around 1940.
The tricky part about this pyramid is that you can’t climb to the top without first satisfying the bottom levels.
In other words, if you have to potty you can forget about creativity, love or morality.
Much of the Buddhist “desire” is the root of human suffering comes not from the simply desiring things.
– After words, desiring not to desire is a very strong desire in itself. -
But from neglecting this order of human self actualization.
Much of the life stress we are experiencing is derived from the fact that we are trying to accomplish – “we desire” – things at a higher level than the level that we have mastered.
In that perspective, “enlightenment” – which would be at the top of the pyramid in the self actualization level – would be a worse desire than the desire of “money” which is only on the second level of the pyramid.
Way too many people are jumping into achieving tasks that are way above their status.
Like starting a family before starting a career – which invariably adds a lot of stress to the relationship and can cause an early failure of the family.
So what has happened to me last year was a crisis triggered by the loss of security in my life, which had triggered problems at my confidence and self esteem level and threatened my family and relationships.
I had to go through a grueling examination of what was going on in my life – those of you that have followed me trough my trials and tribulations know exactly what I’m talking about.
I had to go a step back on my priorities and consolidate my financial “safety” level.
I got rid of all debt – credit cards, car payments etc.
Consolidate my mortgage by refinancing at a 4.35 % interest, 30 year fix loan.
Put some money into a liquid CD – and making a commitment to keep on saving to at least one year of security funds.
Get back on managing my stocks, IRA and 401K.
I know this might sound very unlike Buddha philosophy but consolidating my material life has put my family life on a better footing and had opened one more time my prospects for that elusive self realization.
So hopefully bay sharing our experiences we will learn and grow together, forge some friendships in the way, and feel not so lonely in our journey (troubles).
Sending you all of my love.