Friday, May 15, 2009
The Power Of Forgiveness
1) Here is YOU – young and inexperienced in the ways of the world.
NOTICE: There are no strings or chains attached to you.
You are totally and absolutely free.
No fears, no anxieties.
No hatred no bigotry.
No low self esteem no negativity.
No bad experiences no regrets.
No pain and no suffering.
YOU are just as God intended YOU to be
Or 15 million years of evolution, if you so are inclined to believe :)
By any account: YOU are PERFECT!
2) Here is YOU and your first FUNCTIONAL relationship.
NOTICE: There are still no strings or chains bonding YOU.
True relationships are unconditional:
You give love you receive love, nothing more nothing less.
And there is a FUN part in functional :)
ALSO: Your first relationship – with your parents – theoretically should be the best but in reality it is not always so.
In reality your first human experience could have been # 3
3) Here is your first DYSFUNCTIONAL relationship.
NOTICE: The bondage between YOU and your WRONG DOER (WRD for short) is conditional.
WRD gets his/hers kicks by wrong doing YOU (and that can be anything from physical and/or sexual abuse to indifference and neglect)
And YOU are holding WRD responsible for your situation with the “you owe me something” chain (and that something can be love, respect, understanding, money, a promotion, a reward, an apology or an admission of wrong doing, or God knows what you think would make this right and fix the wrong doing.)
PERSONAL NOTE – This is the reason I avoid giving self improvement advice in my blog.
You can never cover all diversity of human experiences and no matter how hard you try your advice will be flawed and incomplete, so you have to take everything with a grain of salt and try to fill in the blanks as thy apply to your own situation.
4) Here is YOU after your dysfunctional relationship has ended.
NOTICE: You are still tied to your “you owe me” chain, even if your Wrong Doer is gone.
Your feelings are tied to an imaginary relationship that doesn’t exist – I symbolized it as your IMAGINARY BRICK WALL OF PAIN (IBWOP for short)
Notice that in most cases your Wrong Doer doesn’t even care what your feelings are and most likely he/she is already abusing another victim – cause that is the way they get their kicks.
Also notice: While you are tied to the IBWOP you can’t pursue potential loving relationships but…
5) Here is you attracting the wolves; a pack of Wrong Doers that have heard your crying and whining and have smelled fresh blood and tears.
NOTICE: The “normal” people running away from the scene of the incoming massacre.
Yes it is true: Nobody wants a whining, crying, depressed, negative, screwed up partner.
There is no knight in shining armor coming to save you.
Wake up from your self pity fantasy before you end up in…
6) Here is YOU tied up to your IBWOP, immobilized and paralyzed by pain, guilt, fear and God knows what else.
NOTICE: The lovely collection of “you owe me” bracelets, necklaces and other accessories.
Notice the scissors that were always available to you. They are FOIRGIVE and FORGET.
Realize that your Wrong Doers will never pay you back.
I mean really; what do you want from them; love, respect, money or an admission of guilt?
Are you willing to stay like that waiting for THEM to free your soul or are you going to cut the chains loose YOURSELF?
Realize that you are not being good or generous with them but you are finally doing something good for yourself.
Imagine what you would be without “you owe me” chains.
Imagine you as…
7) Here is YOU – older and wiser.
Totally and absolutely free to pursue the love you deserve just like God intended you to do.
I know some of you might ask at this moment:
“What about justice, what about revenge?”
Believe me, there is no greater punishment for a Wrong Doer than a happy, successful YOU.
Your success is ultimately their failure!
And there is no sweeter revenge than to held your head up in victory.
Knowledge is like money – worthless until you spend it.
Here is how you turn your new found knowledge into reality:
Take a piece of paper and write a letter to your Wrong Doer (one at the time if you have more than one)
Be as free in expressing your feelings as you want and at the end tell him/her that you don’t care anymore about their debt to you and that you have set them free – forget them in other words.
Send them the letter or an email or if you don’t know where they are post it on your blog and if you don’t have a blog send it to me and I will post it on my blog for you.
YOU HAVE TO DO THIS
You have to let the universe know of your decision; you have to change your knowledge and ideas into reality.
You have to actualize your thoughts into action.
IT IS THE WAY!