Fear no Fear

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"

Whenever I feel tempted by fear (like these last couple of days) I do my decomposing (or composting, if you prefer thinking in positive terms) meditation.

I go to my Zen temple – Here in Hollyweird for some reason, they call it “Public Park”

I lay down under this ginormous tree (it is essential to feel the grass and the earth pressing against your body)

I look up at the sky and the leaves, and I drift away into this reverie.

I close my eyes and see myself like on one of those national geographic videos where the time takes off at hyper speed.

I grow older and older, white beard, long hair, season after season changing, then I pass away.

My hair falls off, leaves and ground cover up my corpse, bugs eat my flesh, and bones crumble into pieces turning into the compost that's feeding this amazing tree.

And I become branches and leaves and flowers of the tree.

And I open my eyes and I scream at the top of my lungs: Fuck the fear!

And the winos lift their brown bags and cheer “-All right, Buddha!”

And we all laugh, and I go to pick up my kids from school.